Features | Back
to Issue 4
text and photos by Gregor Samsa (a.k.a. John)


Fat Mike Gives Head (or at least the back of it)
No, this is not that kind of
'zine. Not that there's anything wrong with that. No firends, we have something
much more interesting than a gay porno... pictures of the back of Fat Mike's
cranium!! First, a little explanation.
It all started right after NOFX played
their set at the Warped Tour on July 26th [1996]. I was heading over to
see the next band when I stopped in my tracks. It was no one other than
the man/god himself, Fat Mike!! He was gabbing with his minions, so I rushed
over to him and babbled my thinks to him for being him. He gave me that
bemused look, like the look you get from company when your dog tries to
copulate with his leg. Something was hanging out of my mouth, too.
Well, I soon got out of there, and
went over to find Slack [a.k.a. Wade]. I said something to the effect of,
"Fat Mike, camera, Fat Mike!" Syllables just waste time. We rushed over,
camera in hand just in time to see our lord walking away from his disciples.
"Quick, Mike," we yelled, "can we take your picture?" "Sorry, guys. I'm
done. Show's over," was the reply. Undaunted, I countered with, "How about
the back of your head?" He gave his mumbled consent, started walking, and
I started shooting. At first, I couldn't figure out that teh camera neede
to be wound manually, but I figured it out, and got some wonderful shots,
which are displayed here. I stuck with him the whole way across LaSalle
Park, getting strange looks, but I accomplished my job. And I figured out
why Fat Mike is better than god: He turns up on film.
(photo by Wade)